Talking out of Both Sides of Their Mouths

(Or is that “Buttering Both Sides of Their Bread”?. . . well, they have been doing a lot of teabagging lately!)

UPDATED 5-19-2009

The Republicans have stooped to new lows in the latest incarnation of the torture “debate.” Their current inconsistencies are so muddled, moronic, and absurd that it’s hard to believe they’re getting any play time in the media (OK, not too hard to believe considering the intellectual dishonesty of the MSM).

They want to insist that the United States has never tortured. Yet, not only did the torture work, if we don’t continue to torture the ubiquitous Scary Terrorists will annihilate us.

The Bush Administration broke no laws, but if they did, it was only to protect us, and they should absolutely not be investigated (and certainly not prosecuted). Yet, we definitely MUST investigate what Nancy Pelosi knew about torture and when she knew it.

Only the radical “Left” advocates investigations (though almost 75% of Americans are in favor—an awfully skewed left), and only for highly partisan reasons. Yet most of those calling for investigations believe in equal application of the law and want everyone who might have played a role in conspiring to create a system of torture—Republicans and Democrats alike—to be subject to investigation (many of us radical lefties have been calling for investigations of Reid, Pelosi, Rockefeller, et. al. for over two years).

The Republicans are the real Patriots, supporters of the troops, and true Americans. But they’re also the ones who are advocating total disregard for the defining characteristics of American Democracy: the Constitution and the Rule of Law. (Some, like the f*cking brilliant governor of my home state, are even suggesting secession, stupid asswipe!).

Those of us who think sending our troops into harm’s way based on brazen lies, violating their contracts with stop-loss, and bringing them home to inadequate health care and benefits is anything BUT supporting our troops (but as long as you put a bumper sticker on your car, it doesn’t really matter); those of us who think suspending habeas corpus, torturing and murdering prisoners (many of whom we know are completely innocent) expressly for the purpose of eliciting false confessions to justify our illegal wars of aggression, feloniously spying on our own citizens, ignoring Congressional subpoenas and court orders, and otherwise eviscerating the Constitution (that “god dammed piece of paper”) are things we should not be doing are labeled as “UnAmuhrkan.”

The cognitive dissonance of the right is astounding! Maybe any health care reform needs to include automatic psychotherapy for all registered Republicans?

Related to this post, it seemed appropriate to dredge up this lyric, posted quite some time ago.

UPDATE
This article by Matthew Yglesias on The Daily Beast, GOP's Torture Tricks Backfire, adds more perspective on this topic.